‘Too Many Doors’ by Tiffany Belle Harper #Feature
Have we become a generation of scattered minds? I fear so … for we have too many doors open. Leaving way for distraction, muddlements and pending disaster. Again I say … less is more.
I by no means am one to preach – as of recent weeks, due to convalescing after an operation, I have evaluated my time. I had no choice but to slow down and pursue the basic needs before me. One of which was emptying the apartment I’ve sold of my past. In the loft I found cards dating back to my first birthday and then onwards, right through to Valentine cards from my former husband, more than 20 years ago.
Things I’d taken for granted at the time, now remnants gone. Cards to celebrate the birth of my children, new homes, the lot. I felt overwhelmingly sentimental. But due to not having room to keep them all, I decided to be ruthless. Read each one and then gave a small pile to each of my sons. I had no internet at the flat, no TV – so relied on the radio. That too playing nostalgic tunes. I went through my entire life within a week.
I’ve been on a ‘conscious journey for around six months (of a spiritual nature). Deciding that things had to change in my life. I’d become extremely unhappy and felt my spirit evaporating into the wilderness of cyber space. I’ve got a fairly adaptable personality. I like to laugh, I’ve a dry – sometimes wicked sense of humour. I enjoy community events. Yet when I am at home alone, I can fall into days of contemplation that are often wasted by over thought.
In today’s modern age we have so much choice, we often forget to focus on the basic balance for self happiness. We have portals running alongside each other like Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, blogs and so forth. We have to find drive to earn money, that require commitment too. We have friends to keep in the loop – plus family that need love and time. Many of us have pets and outside obligations such as community groups and campaigns.
Yet we still seek more?
Making small steps to help our inner voice can avoid symptoms of addiction and depression. Any addiction whether it is the internet, drug abuse or alcohol first has to be recognised by the victim of self harm. We establish the need to overcome the darkest desires that have no benefit to our long term goals. And then to take one day at a time.
I am fortunate I’ve never tried heroin. I’ve dabbled in the past with this and that, during my younger years. And yeah … I admit if there’s a joint on the go at a party, I’ll take a puff or two. But I don’t keep cannabis in the house and no longer drink at home alone unless it’s the weekend and I’m watching a movie.
I used to go online when I’d had a drink and create arguments with people that weren’t necessary. Usually over animal neglect. When on reflection the other person was probably just as boozed up as me and it achieved nothing. Now I get more involved with campaigns and hitting the cause directly rather than shoot the messenger.
Then there’s obsession where folk can become unhealthily interested in the activity of others, this in turn is a severe form of addiction. The target of the obsessive mind often feeling intimidated, worst still … stalked.
Our minds are excessively full of crap these days. We’ve so much information to process – that often we forget the most important things around us. The people that love us most, just the way we are. Or perhaps our pets! Living alongside others is not confined to species. I don’t know where I’be without my animals.
Improving out mind requires a little self discipline. I set myself goals now. I’ll make a conscious decision to not go online at all for a day or two. The first few hours are tough because I like to see what’s going on. But as I adapt, I find better things to do. When we relinquish one preoccupation we find more rewarding ways to move ahead. This is with ‘absolute’ focus and commitment. It takes time to master the art of adaptation on a long term basis. But if we practice this in small measures, with gradual increase it can be done. It’s like diet. We don’t need to punish ourselves with sacrifice, we need to reduce what is we become ‘food’ obsessed with, until we no longer recall the flavour.
I don’t have a smartphone. Why? I’ve got a class ‘A Personality. I’m the sort of person that if something could take control that is harmful, I’m better to not indulge in the first place. The most interestingly, wonderful people I’ve met in life are addicts of some kind. Smokers, strippers, drag queens, boozers. I’m fascinated by eccentrics and radicals. I like bolshie, non conformists. But those I admire most are quiet people who are happy with a simple life. Seeking not for the approval or distraction of the modern world. But finding solace in their own small space. The ‘finest’ balance being those that have lived and learned – yet can teach from their own mistakes.
We can’t help who we are, we’re a colourful bunch. But for Class A people like me, I’d suggest trying those few steps that can turn into strides of completeness. Follow your hearts, be good to your minds and stay close to your loved ones. A few good doors can inspire – but a corridor can be never ending.
Tiffany Belle Harper.