It’s been such a bleak winter. Nursing my rescue kitty for weeks to some kind of good health where he can enjoy his new life. It drained me as I was not great myself. I sat up all night with him for so long to help him breath. I really thought he would not survive but at least if I lost Billy, he knew the world is not such a cruel place. Fortunately, he is now a healthy, loved, and happy cat. My main aim for the colder months, to help my family in ways I am able. We all have our responsibilities. But this winter has been awful.

My mobile and laptop have been hacked. I am not sleeping and I wonder how or why any person could find the time to spy on me, since my real life is very dull and quiet. It’s turned my entire existence into a private stage show for a cowardly person who clearly has too much time on their hands and it’s cruel.

I have had such loving support from people who are aware of the ongoing problem but it still does not help me to feel any kind of quality of life. What hurts most is that I am not jealous or overly interested in anybody’s activities enough to want to destroy their lives. I stick with my bucket list and sense of freedom. The ability to implement spyware is so easy nowadays and I wonder how many people are also affected by it. Sometimes, it’s better not to know as to avoid the over-thinking and depressed state it can bring to the target.

When you change your mobile number, a hacker still has a back entrance into your phone. And cyber hacking is so advanced, you can get into anything if you can afford to pay for it. It’s the cruelest form of hunting there is.

All I can say to any stalker is not everyone is going to like you or want you around. So be kind in life and let the fanatical patterns go to find a better future, less the ill intentions. Life’s too short anyway. Bringing misery has nothing to feel proud about.

Currently, there are no specially trained units to detect and protect the victims of stalking. Statistics reveal, only 1 in 6 women who are being stalked or harassed, go on to report it to the police. This maybe due to lack of evidence and/or fear of making it worse. Together with the fact, the police are not trained in such matters. And unlike many stalkers who pay for spying and sabotage, the victim will not have the financial freedom to recruit help such as a lawyer who is trained in phycology and criminal behaviour. Also, being stalked is so very draining, the last thing any victim wants to do is scrutinise all their own activities, to see where they are being pursued, both on and offline. At home, in the workplace and when out and about.

The best solution is to try and lead a normal life, in hope the stalker will become bored and just move on (hopefully not to stalk anyone else.) As dealing with a stalker’s habit, is inadvertently giving them the attention they seek. It is an awful predicament for any person being intimidated by such cowardly acts of attention seeking, when there is nothing to be gained by spying on innocent people. And that includes the friends and family of the victim, in order to obtain information and whereabouts of the target. Thus making it hard for any person who is victim to stalking, to escape from it.

And we must remember that a stalker is in belief they are a part of the targets routine, and even their lifestyle, despite the fact they are not ever going to be by natural choice. Such acts are an extreme form of denial and a ‘fantasy world’ lead by the abuser. They may infiltrate sites like WhatsApp, read emails, texts and listen in on phone calls.

I believe the UK needs specific mental health facilities for stalkers and abusers, which address such matters in order to avoid harm and further invasion to victims, both now and in the future.. Innocent victims whose freedom and liberal rights are at risk, in what we are lead to believe is a democratic society.

The selling of spyware over the internet for stalkers, is currently not a prosecutable crime. But the max sentence for a convicted stalker is up to 10 years. One should not feed the other. It begs to question just how many public places with private areas have hidden spyware? A pinhole camera for instance, is so small, it can be inserted inside of a screw head and turned off when magnetic equipment is used to detect the camera. In other words, a hidden lens can be impossible to detect?

Hackers are not bad people. They provide a service and like any other occupation, it is how their clients recruit such skills. Hacking in turn can protect us and save lives. It is so damning that technology can be used to the detriment of those who simply want to enjoy their lives and wish no harm to others. Would a hacker be pleased to find out another man is watching his wife and has pinhole cameras looking in to all his rooms?

Often a stalker will recruit a second or third party to carry out their surveillance. Terrifying to think that complete strangers to the target, have been paid for their time to invade someone’s privacy. The plus side is most surveillance companies are diligent, where they must appear to comply with the law and many do not realise (or prefer not to know) they are simply a stalking aid to their paying client (stalker.) It is disguised with topics such as ‘find out if your wife is cheating.’ When in actual fact most targets are not or never have been involved with the stalker. We live in a dangerously invasive world like this?

If you too are suffering the same, keep a journal and tell those who love you. Don’t be silenced. And never negotiate with a stalker. Please see previous posts scattered around here. Try to make the most of each day and do not live in fear.

Tiff. Xx