There is no word strong enough to describe the violation of being terrorised simply for choosing distance.
When a person does not want someone in their lifeâwhether out of self-preservation, clarity, or sovereigntyâthat boundary should be sacred. But for some, it becomes a challenge. A dare. A trigger for cruelty.
This isnât about their heartbreak. Itâs about your control.
Some individuals, often shielded by privilege or unprocessed emotional immaturity, believe they can force their way into someoneâs life. They weaponise access, proximity, and social camouflage. They use charm, money, or manipulation to override consent. And when that doesnât work, they orchestrate from the shadowsâusing others to do their dirty work.
They create chaos through triangulation, gossip, and manipulation. They keep the target guessing, destabilised, unsafe. Itâs not just abuse. Itâs theatre. And they are the coward behind the curtain.
This kind of abuse is hard to name. Itâs layered. Itâs silent. Itâs devastating. And it often goes undetected. Because the victim is strong. Because they donât fit the stereotype of someone âin danger.â Because theyâre articulate, resilient, and trying to carry on. But strength doesnât mean immunity. In fact, it often makes them a target. The abuser resents their autonomy, their refusal to bend, their clarity. So they punish it. And the systems meant to protect? They often fail. But this can change if those affected have the support and justice they deserve.
I believe Police reports may not capture the nuance. Restraining orders may require proof of escalation. Friends may say âjust ignore them.â But ignoring doesnât stop the erosion. Whatâs needed is trained professionalsâpeople who understand the patterns, the psychology, the silent devastation. People who can intervene before the damage becomes irreversible. Who can say, âI see whatâs happening. Youâre not overreacting. Youâre not alone.
This happens to women.
This happens to men.
This happens to anyone who dares to say no to someone who refuses to grow. Because some people never grow up. Not because they werenât given time, but because they refused experience. They floundered through life avoiding responsibility, dodging discomfort, and curating a glossy façade. They never learned through hardshipânever held a crying child through the night, never stood in a welfare queue, never weathered the storm of turbulent relationships in favour of denial and stability. They skipped the curriculum of learning about empathy. And now, in older age, they are bitter. Resentful. Vindictive.
They behave like malicious children in adult bodies, using money and material gain as shields to protect a hollow core. Their lack of life knowledge has curdled into frustration. And instead of facing that truth, they lash outâthriving on causing pain, misery, and confusion.
Itâs a worthless existence, contrary to how it may appear. And they are often hungry for attention. Any attention. Even negative. So even a blog post like this must be crafted with care. Because naming themâeven obliquelyâcan feed their warped need to feel significant. Thatâs why this post is not for them. Itâs for the ones they target. The ones who feel unseen, unheard, and unsafe. The ones who are strong, but tired. Clear, but punished. Sovereign, but stalked.
Some victims have never met their abuser. The intrusion began onlineâthrough social media, through digital proximity, through the illusion of connection. And it never stopped. Not through direct contact, but through proxies. Through setups. Through the slow, corrosive trespass of someone who refuses to let go.
Others are honey-trappedâlured into false intimacy, then punished for trying to leave. Manipulated, surveilled, emotionally blackmailed. Itâs not just romantic betrayal. Itâs strategic entrapment. And itâs happening to men, too. Quietly. Invisibly. Devastatingly.
If youâre living in the ânot knowing whatâs next,â if youâre being punished for choosing peace, if youâre being stalked by someoneâs emotional baggageâknow this:
You are not imagining it.
You are not too sensitive.
You are not wrong for asking for help.
You are protecting your life.
And that is sacred.