I haven’t been blogging as much as I should, and it’s important for all of us to resist becoming complacent with our own voice — especially in a world so often arranged by a pecking order. The quiet ones are frequently the folk with the most worthy stuff to say. But we all have our own ways of measuring self‑worth, and today, for once, I had a little time away from humping boxes around, entertaining guests, and meeting the usual obligations of day‑to‑day life.

Jazz as the Gold Dust of Life

After a couple of glasses of decent prosecco, I somehow nodded off for a long, unexpected snooze. I woke to the radio — Jazz FM, naturally — just as a repeat of April’s Jazz Awards 2025 kicked off on their station. Some of the winners were unfamiliar by name, but the moment the tracks played, they unlocked memories of summer: pottering in the yard, preparing guest rooms, bantering with the pets. Jazz has always been a unifying love‑source for me. It lifts, it steadies, it threads light through every scenario. Jazz is the gold dust of life.

When Online Shadows Spill Into Real Life

Life dishes out its blows, and in the context of the world’s problems, I feel grateful. But in my own world — as I’ve mentioned before — things took a sharp turn in November 2022. What had been a nagging, difficult situation across my online spaces escalated into something horrific in my real life. And with stalking, baiting and harrasment, it is often easier for those affected — I prefer the term survivors — to unfortunately say nothing. What can’t be seen is easily dismissed as hearsay, even when it corrodes your mental and physical wellbeing. Your entire outlook, your routine, your sense of safety and ability to earn a living can become a kind of living hell.

The Silent Weight of Stalking

Jazz has been my anchor through it. Sharing music feels like passing on a little optimism, a reminder to focus on the good that still surrounds us. And when you finally begin to emerge from the worst — which I hope I am — you look back and realise just how extreme those events truly were. With stalking, so much of the suffering happens in silence. Psychological harm is the hardest to articulate. Even worse when it gets into your actual personal space.

The Digital Cowards of Our Era

Stalking doesn’t even begin to define the extent of this problem or the way lives are being quietly ruined by cowards in their digital playgrounds. With a handful of apps and — worse still — too much spare time and financial privilege, an unstable individual can strip another person of their privacy and walk away untouched. These people often slip under the radar with charming online personas or hardcore internet fandoms they use as shields, disguising what they’re really doing behind the scenes of all that fake bravado. And that worries me.

I use women at work or women living alone as my example because that’s the category I fall into, but I know full well that kids and men also suffer at the hands of stalkers. I’m relieved to see that the government is beginning to take this more seriously. I hope — for the sake of those who will unfortunately become the next targets — that anyone who finds themselves latched onto by a stranger through any channel will receive full, meaningful support from the law. Words alone won’t fix this. We need tech experts and psychological experts who can recognise the traits early and investigate the bubbling pots before they boil over.

No woman should have to explain what has happened to her in a way that invites ridicule. And it’s essential that there are safe, accessible portals where people can speak out about their predators without feeling small, ashamed, or disbelieved. And let’s be honest: those who become obsessed with the activity of one other person need to seek professional help and recognise that what they’re experiencing is an addiction, not affection.

Reclaiming Comfort, Community & Rhythm

But I don’t want my final blog of 2025 to be defined by the negativity that has haunted my privacy and mindset since things took a turn for the worst in 2022. I want to talk about the antidotes — the things that keep us going. Keeping busy. Finding ways to engage with a community, online or offline. Creating comfort in our homes. Building little sanctuaries of our own making.

And then there’s jazz. Well — jazz for me. We all have our genres that catch us when we fall. Jazz FM has lifted some of my scariest moments into something softer, something with value and appreciation, something that reminds me that even in the darkest stretches, there is still rhythm, still warmth, still a pulse of comfort in my world.

Rising Above Spite

We should never cave in to the malice that grows out of other people’s dissatisfaction or the lack of depth they carry in their own inner turmoil. Life is precious, and it takes real strength to rise above the pressure of egotistical spitefulness. But if this kind of nonsense ever comes your way, take it as a strange sort of compliment. Yes, it can have extreme and negative implications on your life, but it also means you’re doing something right. Jealousy is, unfortunately, part of the landscape for decent people.

Small tweaks can transform the way we live. Keeping the house tidy in manageable doses. Getting out into the community or hobbying online. Baking yourself a proper meal. Learning a new skill — like me making my own body lotion, experimenting with new recipes, collecting vintage treasures, writing poetry and ideas by hand. And jazz. Always jazz. Jazz all the way. Anything that keeps us from becoming stagnant and reminds us that the cowards’ playground is nothing more than a stage for fools.

Acceptance, Freedom & Treating Others Well

Finally, it all comes down to acceptance. We see protests, violence, and bias everywhere, but for any activist who wants their voice and their freedom, there has to be an understanding that everyone else is entitled to the same. I advocate freedom of speech, but freedom of the keyboard can become a cowardly and sinister mask to hide behind. May we learn to treat others as we ourselves wish to be treated. Nobody should be excluded from music, culture, or trend because of their political leanings. We are, in the end, everything together. We’re allowed our opinions, our tastes, our chosen news sources and tribes without having to justify them to anyone.

A Note From The Fylde

The Fylde is a happy place. All are welcome here, so long as they arrive with goodness in their hearts and a willingness to contribute to our shared public spaces. And to those who support our hospitality — thank you for booking in advance. It makes all the difference. May the coming year bring fabulous travel, hope, and goodwill to everyone who passes through.

Hopes for 2026

I hope 2026 brings faith and hope to all. I hope the monsters of society are finally made to consider the lives they damage with such ease. And I want to wish everybody a very gorgeous New Year — to include our beloved friends across the pond, who continue to lead by example.

Tiffy Belle🐇