Writing About The ‘Dark’ Days and the Power of ‘Hope’

It’s Friday already ! Where do the weeks go … ? I hope yours was a good one my blogging friends.

I have spent a while concentrating on my personal world and writing my book. I suffer with focusing issues when there’s too much going on and find myself heading off in all kinds of directions, often leaving the most important tasks unfinished.

Little obligations become big problems if we don’t sort our stuff out. I realise that. So I’ve found a balance between my home and pleasure. Combining both …

I’d lost my confidence writing. I’m not good at it but I am passionate so I’ve bit the bullet and got on with things. I didn’t want to write ‘all encompassing’ inspiration or ‘lift me up’ type stuff. But rather, the truth laid bare about my ‘real’ past. So that ‘hopefully’ other women in particular will be able to find solace in the normality of our insecurities.

Writing about my journey has opened up things that happened for which I’d forgotten. It’s made me weepy, but I’ve found resolve at the same time. I’ve been writing about how life has taken me. Relationships, struggling. Feeling some days there’s no purpose in my life. Soul searching. But I’ve still laced it with humour. I believe a good sense of humour is a tonic in this day and age.

I am still hugely spiritual yet am defining this sense of ’empathy’ with life situations (and beyond) with practicality. Writing my book has allowed me to see where I have gone wrong. I’d like to say ‘no regrets.’ But I do have them. Yet our mistakes can help us to achieve better things for the future if we take our own lessons as guidance.

I’ve been writing in a place that has no internet. It has helped my creativity. I have felt more confident to be ‘me’ away from peer pressure and my sensitivity.

I was going to blog each chapter, to get some feedback. But then I decided to trust my own instincts as the book is not with material intent but more of a way to record my blue print for my own sense of worth. 

The book is about my life between 2010 and 2016 with flash backs to the past then present. It’s  not a condemning book. There’s no name shaming. It’s about ‘me.’ There’s going to be a few shocking revelations too. Yes, I lived in the underworld for a while. But during this time in what some would call ‘hell’ I found great friends. None of this is online based, it’s all ‘real world’ stuff. In that I went there and yes it broke me into little pieces for a while. But I mended, went on to tell the tale (and that I am doing.) It’s awful being sensitive but it sure beats being wicked.

But then as my good friend ‘The Lonely Author’ taught me. Sometimes, we do need to write wicked, just to show we’re able to address all aspects of within. I suppose it’s a case of being true to who we are.

We can’t enjoy the light until we’ve been in the dark. The hard part is getting out alive. In every sense. Mind – Body and Soul.

Today I am being crafty with paint … We’re on the look out for abandoned pieces of wood that need to re-live their beauty.

I will check my emails on Sunday, Tuesday and Friday.

Finally, there’s a Twitter hashtag that I set up a while ago named #StopAnimalAbuse out there. It’s good to have one common phrase to unite many causes, I feel. Well, let’s hope so. I am sure the big boys will embrace the attention. May it ‘always’ be about the animals and getting ‘everyone’ involved. A minefield of ‘ego’ could be used to help the ‘voiceless’ on all levels.

I always say, ‘it’s what comes first in our hearts that define us.’

For some it’s fame and greed, whilst others it’s to sincerely want to help the less fortunate.’ Sadly, all too often the latter assume they must rely on the first. A vicious circle of never-ending imbalance. It’s about a happy medium, surely?

Tiffany. X

Have a great week ! ps Thanks to Lisa for helping out with emails and stuff.

 

‘Forgiveness’ by Tiffany Belle Harper

Forgiveness is an act that works both emotionally ‘within’ and productively in our outer world. Carrying around anger is a destructive cycle. I admit to being a victim of my own resentment at intervals in my life.

When hostility manifests itself, it usually derives from a misunderstanding somewhere, that was not nipped in the bud during early stages. We often overlook these signs and actions, or cultivate the rivalry to grow further.

This can be because we become emotionally attached to the situation and one or both parties start to engage in negative battles. Yet if we are able to find constructive ways to adopt during our relationships with others, we can then build healthy bridges that could improve our life experiences as friends and/or teams  … however we are connected.

We do have to accept in life, we simply cannot get on with everybody. We’re all a mixed bunch – but it’s also true that opposites can attract. So it’s a case of finding a balance of having the right people around us – in that we have a range of company, allowing us to grow as individuals.

I’m on a life journey where I have let go of much I was attached to. I still love my friends and family. I care for my pets. But I was carrying baggage that I knew I had to relinquish. Being victim to a physical attack can create a fear that builds a shell around our delicate anatomy. It would be fair to say that for several years now, I’ve not been the real me …

Initially, way back in 2009/2010 I lost my confidence, cutting off a lot of people that were so special to me. I did this because I’d detached a part of my ‘self’. I am a deep thinker and I admit I allowed my thoughts to take over productive actions, by spending way too much time searching for temporary solutions on the internet.

When we go online there is a wall between reality and illusion. This is why I always suggest to people that form bonds, they meet and allow that friendship to develop in a natural form alongside the virtual.

Life is precious, we should not allow or insecurities to create battles that could otherwise lead to love or lessons that are going to aid our progress as people.

It’s so important to learn that whilst we are able to inspire, we should also be inspired. I suppose because, for a while, that became years … It all seems like such a blur right now. I gave myself to inspire, often forgetting I first need to fix myself. It drained me of my own healing resources.

The journey I’ve been on has been painful, frightening, soul searching and frankful. But I am still walking forward with a wisdom that I’ve paid a price for. Yet this time has only validated that we are with a higher source. A beautiful light that never leaves our side. Strengthened by faith. For those who do not feel this, please find your truth, for it awaits us all.

I want to forgive my attacker and the mental cruelty that I have experienced from a small few along the way. I want to love you unconditionally. Life is sweet, quite beautiful. Nature is staggering. Forgiveness is the key to happiness and seeing just how spectacular all of our journeys can be. So please join me today and forgive your enemies. That they may forgive us. May we love unconditionally.

I also wish to apologise for my sometimes defensive attitude, this is something I am working on. To say sorry to those who have hurt me, as I have them.

At this point in my life. I’ve no ongoing battles, no axe to grind, no animosity. This hasn’t always been the case. It is a personal pledge to myself to try and keep it this way. I want to build friendships that can benefit the purpose of my existence. Love, unity and collaboration are a must to find happiness.

forgiveness

(Extract from my book that I’m writing)

~Namaste~

Tiffany Belle Harper.

You Must Shine #Video for all of you by Tiffany Belle Harper – Warmest wishes for a New Year!

Those that have been around me online, via my workshops, friends and family (and new friends on WordPress), you may know I love to make little videos to inspire. Here’s something I created for you with the posters and words people have sent to me during 2015 to add to projects.

I sincerely wish you a ‘New Year’ filled with hope and optimism for all of your aspirations.

Friendship is so important. Choose wisely – Less is more and never forget that love has to start with self. Truly love who you are and the rest will follow.

Namaste

Tiffany Belle Harper x