Mess and Mood by Tiffany Belle Harper – February 2021

Sunday always has such a personal vibe about it. And I decided to let go of all that has no value to me. Unfortunately, most things that did, have since been stolen from my flat in Blackpool. For months it broke my heart how anyone could do this to me – but you either get on with it, or fester on the bad intent. Either way it is in the past and that is where it stays. I am over it and I only have me to blame for being too busy to realise it was happening over a long period of time. I have learned a tough lesson and it will not happen again in a hurry.

Blackpool is like anywhere else in that you move to a new area and you do not know anybody. Blank pages – and it takes time to fill those pages. The chapters begin and you live through your own book. However, I don’t have time to write that much, so my book is the colourful things that really do happen to us each day. We live. We learn. We teach. We give thanks. We grow. 

I am hugely sensitive; particularly if someone faults my parenting or my pets welfare. That is a big no for me. So, watch it! Cos I will have you in a court room before you know it. Apart from that, I can deal with most stuff. I am an adult and if something offends me it is probably because I glanced at it or gave that person or people too much of my precious time. So, dealing with how my hours pass is a big obstacle for me that I am doing well at these days. Because recent events have shown us we have support and love around us from people who have been about for many years. And as we expand our circles we can often overlook the most ‘significant others’ in our hearts who really do want the best. Less is More.

Getting back to letting go of mess. I am transitional once more. I have stockpiled a lot of personal junk – deciding my money works better not to buy nice things for ‘me’ in favour of cheaper stuff as when you were repeatedly robbed, you pause before you spend. I wear my clothes hard. I am on my knees scrubbing. Bleaching. Washing, baking, cooking, and having the pets jumping on us. Therefore, I do need to remind myself more than often to throw things away when they are tatty … despite … loving ragged.

I have opened the doors to guests here, the place is spotless, checked them into their rooms, felt a sense of accomplishment. That is until, I happen to look in a mirror (I do not have one in the flat). I see a woman who is covered in bits of food, sometimes seaweed and sand, wax, paint, cleaning supplies and pet fluff, with un-brushed hair and sometimes dirty teeth. Yes. You work seven days a week during high season. You fall into bed and you get out of it again. And that dirty bitch is no less than ME! Ha! Your time is service. I see other hoteliers looking pristine. I used to wonder how they did it, then decided not to give a shit as I am what I am. That was until I made the decision to put out my clothes the night before. Got a towel by the shower, with my toiletries ready to wash and set the alarm an hour earlier. Remember, I have the pets to feed and care for before we start to cook breakfast for sometimes 25 plus people.

I do have help. I am blessed. But still, I am constantly at logger heads with my own routine. So today I am not holding what I like. I am keeping what I plan to wear in the next six months, which covers most weather. I am letting go of what holds me back. Fabric makes dust. I don’t have a wardrobe here. Instead, two clothes rails and they do make dust! Where I am going has a gorgeous big bespoke hand-crafted triple pine wardrobe that’s painted in a creamy colour. My two rails of clothes won’t fit in it. I have visions of this stunning piece of sustainable furniture being accompanied by a clothes rail rammed into a convenient gap in the apartment and it spoils our new bedroom completely. Then I will be flustering about where to put everything that I don’t really use or need but have become attached towards. Back to square one. So, I am being ruthless with me today and letting much of it go to allow for ‘the new’ with less baggage.

I have spent much of my live living in small spaces. And when I visit people with big spaces, I don’t envy them because all I see is more work. More clutter. More responsibility.

Travel light and live for adventure. If you are not going to use the rooms then why buy space. It is just a statement. That said my darlings, Belleva House is a hotel. A place that will go to work with us. Somewhere that yes we will run around at night and the pets will explore, but the apartment is where we snuggle and slumber.

But then, there is our arty stuff, the crafting. Wax, mica powders, mannequins, pans and brushes. Sigh … they shall have to stay. Where would our lives be without our toys for progress in our heart journeys.

Photo with this blog is my big boy Ashley. Our kids never grow up they just get bigger. Every person needs a Mum type person in their life. This photo is about 5 years old. I since lost my doggy in it. He was 21 and died in my arms. Never got over it and never want to. I love you Foley.

Now am going to tackle a huge clean washing pile in the bathroom that I have walked past so often I forgot it wasn’t a permanent fixture.

Namaste!

Tiff. X

Forgive Yourself and Change – Let Magic come Organically

The only other place I have experienced such energy is The Tor at Glastonbury after climbing to the top many moons ago. It is said The Tor will show us who we really are and on my arrival to the peak of the hill after a slow and very muddy ramble, I felt great peace and yet unknown challenge ahead. I shall return. Somerset is where I will grow old to my death. It’s in place. Enlightened the plight of Dion Fortune. Her book for which I read whilst lodging in Wells.

I don’t live in a material mindset as this type of value can take presidency over the reality of purpose. But there is an equilibrium where we need money to get by or at least food and a roof over our head. Yet it is unsure to me why any human would enjoy to hoard money for no intent or purpose other than to be on a rich list?

This pandemic has bought the reality out in most of us. While some ‘disappointingly’ think, ‘how can I use this situation to get the best out of this possible for my own recognition,’ others take solace towards the less fortunate and reach out to work in teams and infrastructure, or just to offer solid support within community situations. Either way it’s brought more people so much closer together. When we have our basic privileges taken from us, we appreciate the simple things so much more. Such like going out for a good cup of coffee or noticing a child’s smile as we queue for a table.

It’s always disappointing to notice a small majority take pleasure and advantage in those who struggle and often in such a back handed, egotistical way. Empaths will notice this more. But what we must do during our biggest battles is see this as our opportunity to climb to the next lesson in the higher order. To leave the dead skin behind and not fear change. Variety makes our souls dance. Routine is very different to stability. For a true and clarified pathway only comes with great sacrifice and change.

However we may be forced to contemplate our perception of others, bear in mind nobody has the perfect life or circumstances. If that can ever be possible then the recipient of such treasure is not embarking on the true journey of their soul purpose. We can’t run away or hide from our life lessons as it is these lessons that define us as an ever-growing vessel of change and objective.

My life now for which I have chosen is one (for now) of fixed address, where of course I must be more cautious of how much I choose to share, because with (human nature) not everyone wants the best for another. There will be those who have resentment, anger, inner turmoil, who wish to land that baggage on to the lap of another. But when we reflect on such acts of hate, it is the very individuals who send such negativity that need help most. Despite how they often appear on the outside, their resentment towards another is a denial of their own antipathy within themselves.

When things don’t go according to plan during our life purpose there is always a reason and that reason lies within our own education of how to avoid this cycle of chaos repeating itself over and over again. We can almost create an ‘alter ego’ using the web platform where we grow to believe we are the person we claim as our own identity. But really, it is as much important and clearly more so if you so desire to have two personas to do something on the same line of your keyboard identity in the real world too.

I used to be so frustrated with the entire ‘bully’ culture. Those who use their time and energy to seek revenge on others in ways that are often difficult for the ‘victim’ to defend themselves. A few people I care about have over the years removed themselves from the online platform entirely because of this. It’s passive aggressive behavioural cycles where often the instigator gains popularity with a self-obsession to appear a role model of all things good using the internet portal – when really they are using that privilege to attack someone else with a love hate wrangle deriving from their own misgivings. And often the victim may appear confident and outgoing despite suffering extreme despair at the hands of jealousy and obsession. This is a form of stalking and harassment and there are laws to protect us but sometimes seeking help can only become a hassle, when really any victim just wants the cycle to stop and disperse. Shaking off a bully is impossible until we realise it just doesn’t matter. These tests are sent to hold us back. Really, no person with an unhealthy obsession towards you and your business is ever going to benefit your personal goals and accomplishments. To be great you must be undeterred by the small minded. To remind yourself they will soon move on to someone else. That is until they learn to correct this pattern of self harm within their own existence.

These things are not to be grasped or absorbed and there is never a way to avoid this happening. It is down to each of us to choose whether we want to be in a cycle of bitter revenge or to keep moving forward on our unique individual journey to find a true purpose in order to help the planet in its entirety by actively getting involved – remember small steps build pyramids collectively.

All I can say if you know deep down in your heart you are full of anger, revenge and resentment despite appearing otherwise, you must be deeply unhappy. Perhaps now for all those bullies out there it is time to stop and take heed of who you really are and what you are all about? To look at your past and embrace your future, free of your burden to wish harm to another. To see where your own responsibility dwells in all of the chaos your troubled mind carries and how to heal yourself. To be silent for a while and do not be afraid to ask the universe to reveal your own identity. To recognise your actions of malice and evil intent (often hidden in good gesture) so shamelessly aimed towards those who do you no harm. Now is the time to ask for forgiveness for your unresearched and unnecessary objectives.

I am not in Blackpool because I have to be. I am here because it grips me. The quirkiness of the place, the sunset, the sand and the passion of gail force winds to the West. The determination of the working class from The North who come here for entertainment or contemplation.

It’s not mine or your responsibility to endure acts of spite. It is only the mindset of the mentally sick to begin that process of cure and that can only come with sincerity. It is overwhelmingly disappointing to know that during this challenge to mankind there are those still sending bad intentions out to others. We should all have just one common goal right now and that is to survive and give the children the education they deserve. One of truth and one of nature. One of survival and progress on a global scale. TBH.

The last lockdown earlier this year I ‘had’ planned on finishing my book, for which is in safe keeping with a friend, but I got little time to myself. If another close down comes soon, it will be total lock down for me and a time to manifest what I have started. I am lucky. I don’t need the validation of another. I don’t wish for anything I am unable to provide for myself. And when I love, it’s for nothing by return other than trust, support and laughter. We are One.

I have love from those who respect my free spirit and so do you. I have support when I need it most, and so do you. But most of all I have no regrets in terms of trying to make the most of my life. It’s not so public now. Whereas I enjoyed to blog and share my journey. You realise as you get older not everyone wants the best for another. There are those small few (for all of us at some point in life) that no matter how much you do for the good, they become infuriated further with a desire to see you fall. That’s human nature. Sadly, yes it is ‘human nature’ folks and emotional intelligence is very different to education. Actions speak louder and kindness comes with courage not bravado. It’s how you feel about  your inner turmoil when you wake in the night and reflect on your own sense of sincerity. To never feel remorse for being unkind, wicked or insincere in your agenda = time to wake up and find your light and a new perception. The eyes can never conceal cruelty, as the eyes are the window to our soul. Look a person in their eyes before words first spoken.  

During these difficult times with the struggling climate, our beautiful planet and a pandemic affecting the lives, wellbeing and livelihood of others, we see those who with a sincere concern for the feelings of others, yet also and most sadly, those who turn this episode in history to an advantage for their own career or purpose. In other words, thriving on the hardship of current trends and a means to seek attention –  and that’s what a lot of our global changes are all about. Shaking off the negative energy deriving from those who appear greater. Life can trick us. Magic is real and the good are quiet more so than ever because they work on such deeper levels of consciousness.

We can honestly put the love circle of our intimate existence on one hand. Our soul purpose is not on Twitter, Facebook or any other platform. These means are simply an introduction or opportunity to release our own press to those who give some time each day to catch up with another form of communication. A freedom so cruelly abused by too much hysteria and faux material. But I believe that more importantly for our vision is to touch base with the universe, the undiscovered potential within our crafts and purpose that will be guided by the infinite light of all that is our true purpose. Time to face our regrets, to let go of the mundane cycle of denial and fear of change. Stability is the will to not fear change. To not be told that change is harmful. Without change we lie dormant. Without change a bully defines freedom of hate speech and the infliction of suffering. Nothing stays the same, we are what we do with ‘good intention’, no less.

There are those using this current pandemic to bring hearts together and (tragically enough) others to drive people apart. Be careful who you trust, where you put your time and how you continue. The most beautiful people can have the most hateful souls. A book is a cover. A book is a title but what you read is the intent and often lack of real life experience – fiction on rewind with no research or depth.

Life should be of greater value than reviews, likes, shares, follows and approval. It’s not about appearing to be an advocate of anything good. It is more so about your own sense of value and knowledge and the best philosophy of that which often may seem unnoticed – but our own will is the flat dimension for which is an atmosphere of only pure love beyond the negativity and sadly one where too often create so shamelessly for our own selfish purpose. Less is More.

It is not right for any person to give themselves permission to cause unnecessary hardship towards another. We are seeing who we really are. We are being told who we really are. We are being shown our purpose and we have to think about what if the internet did not exist who and what would any of us truly be left with? I personally would love to see this world without the internet forever but let’s ponder how we could cope albeit for a month or two? Believe me, we would all be in a much better place. Humans would be forced to let go of lazy habits and find stories and entertainment on their own doorsteps. We would help friends and neighbours. We would become our own tribes and thrive in reality. We would appreciate our climate, our loved ones, our own sense of purpose much more. Cowards would have no portal. Neighbours would have more of our time. When a child is born we should not wish them an entire life stretch on the internet. There would be little point in being here at all if this were the future. A keyboard, screen and head full of propaganda. How dreadfully misguided is the system so many are hooked into. 

Without the internet we could write letters, draw pictures, be exited for the postman. We would spend more time with our significant other and find ways to invigorate new hobbies, past times, romance and opportunity. We would notice nature more and the faux lives of the desperate less. Our lives would be better.

It is about balance, sadly algorithms and paying often huge sums for recognition are not about the true meaning of balance. We ourselves and our inner rhythms are about balance – harmony – contentment. There can be no balance with hashtags, pretending to be someone or something else or adhering to public demand with time better spent broadening our own horizons. And that means change, letting go, being original and rising our vibrations above and beyond the small mindedness that holds us back and that is how the negative works. It wants us to stand still, it wants to hold us back, to keep us in the now – tangled up in worlds that are not our own. We have to be careful we are not using our natural energetical forces to feed the greed and ego of others. How far would you go to make money from promoting the work of someone else you didn’t even like, really? I have observed such betrayal in the so called land of spirituality. I was not surprised. 

The best thing that can happen to you today is what you do for yourself. And no act of self improvement is ever too small. Let your addictions become value to your goals by turning your focus towards a sense of only wellbeing to yourself and those who support you. Time best spent doing things of good self intent and ‘love nourishment.’ Let go. Be free. Be wise and know your time being quiet, your time trying to understand hurt and pain is your reason to self validate your crafts and energy for greater things to come. Music. Baking. Crafting. Loving. Saying Thank You. Sharing. Forgiving. Improving. No human is a God. No human is better for money. Avoid the foolish and be kind to yourselves. He who needs an army will die empty handed.

I want to thank my time with the universe today for this insight for my sense of completeness, my oneness and purpose.

For the fools of life, this dimension, forgive their ignorance. I deflect their insanity. We forgive their intent. We forget their existence. We continue. We breath. We learn. We grow. As One. Nature is our Blessing. Blessings. Blessings to ALL who fall and a hand up to those that rise with righteousness and a sacred passion of hope for the future, for all, globally.

Amen.

Tiff. X

July = focused + heart = bliss

It was lovely to have some time with my family last week. Also to catch up with my heart. To have some space. Nice to get home to my friends too. Somethings are best kept personal. A wasps nest is in my shed. It’s fascinating what nature can do. The grey piece of art work below is another masterpiece by Mother Nature. Many of you would want to remove the wasps but the trouble is with a lot of town and city folk they believe that hampering with nature is progressive. It’s not. Let them come to you. If you try to tame any animal they struggle to adapt to the wild. That’s why I don’t call Percy down or expect him to perform like a monkey in a circus in a mainstream pivot of fake news that costs money and time. He comes here when he wants and small moments I share when he allows. Nature isn’t a show piece. As ‘that’ we are probably starting to ‘increasingly’ realise, with recent events. Let’s enjoy being ‘personal’ it’s right. Less is More. Saves money too. Watch out for the quiet ones, they’re making music.

Tiff. X

Busy Bee … by Tiffany Belle Harper

This week been here and there with things, it’s been beautiful so far – please continue happy vibes! I have crafted the sweetest little melts. I did not realise you can actually up-cycle used wax too if you keep to certain temperatures. So these are actually up-cycled melts! I have been oggling my prints, they were very affordable. With hospitality it is not always about expenditure … as things can so easily get damaged or lost, but more so just working with the colours and genres you like without worrying too much. Completely, madly, truly in love …is all I want to say right now! And happy birthday to the lovely Jeremy Corbyn – I am not savvy with politics these days – the news and media got me in a dark place which is not ideal with all the problems people already face in the real world … We hope your day is filled with love Jeremy, your family and nice food, your garden. Oh and I found a secret garden near Lytham where the two elderly volunteers gave me some mint so I made some mint sauce and then I made up yet more lemon barley water with pearl barley, honey and lemon. Been nesting aswell but more on that in a good few months.

Tiff. X