February 2021 – Hello by Tiffany Belle Harper

Some time out has helped me fall in love with ‘blogging’ once more. I used to write here for my own comfort and sanity. Sometimes asked ‘what’s my niche?’ As here is not about one specific thing. But hey, a blog can be about anything or nothing. It’s a place that’s free to store or share. I am 55 and I have never had a fixed routine. I have a ‘free spirit’ where some like constancy, we hate it. Of course, I have my anchors in loved ones to include pets. But my life has changed so significantly these last few years It has ‘in turn’ made me think about what I share online.

I work in the public eye, whereas previously I was entirely nomadic. Embracing a ‘get up and go’ to a cottage or hut to explore new ‘natural’ territory alone. No fear. I would put up a tent on a hill and think nothing of sleeping in rough and rugged wild territory.  I cannot do that as much now. But then I am lucky I ever had the chance to exercise my freedom to the full extent. I am really thankful as this freedom has made me who I am. Sometimes unmanageable and very honest about how I feel and how things affect me.

If you can’t tell the truth, then what is the point of having a tongue. It is disappointing our fingers on a keyboard have made so many real people voiceless. We can be any type of thing on the internet, even an animal. Time draining, fat consuming and a portal to addiction. Though, without a doubt, it is good to escape when we can remember it’s not permanent. That we do all have a life of some kind waiting for us to live. And that is not necessarily on social media. It is about balance. A healthy balance that makes us feel complete about our lives each day. Each hour. Each time we feel depressed or alone in our hearts.

There are alternatives and choices. Even during lockdown. To bake, do the gardening, craft, take a walk, to learn a new skill. To look through our junk and see if there’s something we could make from our rubbish. To upcycle. To be inspired by influencers who have positive activities for which we may engage. There are no heroes – we are all worthy of doing great things, regardless of how life makes us feel. As long as you sleep at night knowing you have made your day work for you, that is all that matters. To sleep well with your conscience and self-gratitude. You are worth it.

I always have blogs in my head, but I think I became distracted more by social media. It made lazy, that coupled with a fear of sharing ‘the real me’ publicly. But then life is short, we should never feel so oppressed that we hide away. That’s when depression and deep thinking set in. We can put ourselves into a lonely black hole where nobody can find us. And we can only see algorithms and the same faces over and over again.

It is not weak to share how we really feel and who we truly are. It is our birth right. We all have a voice. There is no such thing as a perfect life or ‘lifestyle and there’s no such thing as a ‘perfect’ family or relationship. We are born with these imperfections and then we go through life gathering our own experiences to manifest into something more focused for our own destinations. The greatest gift of all is love. With love comes security and focus to try harder. Be better. To know we have the right support. To allow for mistakes and to be patient. To not be judged. To listen and learn from different viewpoints.

I have been making soap, wax melts. I have a business in Blackpool where I lease a business in hospitality. I have gone on to buy my own place that is ‘work in progress’ and I still write and love photography, plus tech. These are my hobbies.

We are in lockdown. I do not disagree with this. I do hate that so many people are losing their livelihoods, I want to help them all. It is a terrible predicament. But we must ride the storm until we can control the death rates and illness that comes with the virus before us. That said there is also an epidemic of mental health issues not to mention ailments and life-threatening diseases not being addressed because of the focus on the pandemic. We need to come together and support where we can. Check out those hiding away. The quiet ones.

Nonetheless, I realise that firstly, before anything else, I need to look after me. We open our doors and heart; we get eaten alive. This can leave us depleted. Love is when we give and take. Less is More. I hate to feel smothered or obliged by those who expect me to dance on eggshells. My personal ‘heart people’ are on one hand. ENOUGH. The rest is work and focus. It’s tough being in business. Especially in this climate of such great upheaval. But we need to listen to nature. She is telling us she wants our help collectively.

Friendship and love are about accepting our free ways and not trying to disfigure them. I have spent much of my life on a guilt trip I am ‘not‘ doing enough for others, most of whom would do fuck all for me but then we do not give to expect and equally we can only give so much. All that baggage is gone. And I must stay on track! Less is More …

Please read here with me as much as you can and look at my other posts, because I want to talk with you about crafting. I want to rant. I want to show you what I am doing in Blackpool. My blog (since 2014) is sporadic and has no system but It’s my space and I love to be around people as much as I enjoy my own time. Thanks for dropping by. You can subscribe to my blog and it will be sent directly to your inbox! Please get involved. Also for special offers and latest news on my hotel. I do meet my online friends. I am a very ‘real’ person! But we must wait for life to heal.

So finally, here’s a couple of cheap meals. I found these pots of mash potato in Heron Foods. I think I paid about 40p. They are just delicious. And then I made a leafy salad with jalapeno peppers, tomatoes, onion, Mexican relish and grapes! It barely touched the sides .. tasted SOOO good – yom!  Look after yourselves. Money or not, we can eat on the cheap.

Even when I am at work where I can cook anything, I go in favour of hot pots. You can make a huge bowl of whatever you want to last for a couple of days, when kept in the fridge – better still, freeze it or share with friends. I tend to buy frozen bulk vegetables now, also frozen fruit as when I am on my own, I hate to throw excess away, but if you do, veg and fruit make great compost and the birds like fruit too. I will soon share some of my hot pot baking. We are what we eat and baking at home improves our personal carbon footprint. Less packaging a happier planet! Says me the hypocrite with a pot on my PC of potato. But hey … I believe it’s the first pot or packet I have purchased in a long time. (Mash being one of my favourite comfort foods).

Tiffany Belle Harper. X

Sunday sharing – happy solstice – candles – nature #diary

Last year my mobile was stolen from by my bed, I got used to this type of thing – but what I can never replace are the pictures in it. An entire year of memories. I have learned to lock the back door and my flat door, claiming our own space.  At the time I was so disorganised. I have a lot of pictures to sort out. My eldest son has started drawing once more. I am pleased. Being in isolation can be so soul searching. I got a day out at The Lakes with Marc and Nathan. We did have a lovely time. Been working in The Nester. I cannot rush this as I have not put a plan in action. It’s not about anything other than feeling right for me and those I love. It will come together organically … just like everything else we do.

My birthday was nice this year. I was not expecting any type of celebration. Many of my neighbours said hello which was so lovely and a lot of my old friends found me on a little private Facebook I set up, so I could manage the business accounts from it. I didn’t know until the day after when Marc told me I had messages. I felt quite emotional as it bought back some beautiful memories of my more spiritually enhanced days – days when I lived totally in the moment. I am hoping the girls will come and do some workshops with me. They are just fantastic women. Also Janet Alleyne is going to host a baking weekend hopefully in September. I really want this to happen. It will be an all inclusive weekend in Blackpool. Going to give my dad another quick call as this morning I was doing ten other things. I want to make sure he is okay. I have to visit my parents and eldest son very soon. I have not seen them for months. I want to get away for a bit. Tiff. X

 

Sunday – My Seagull – Crafting – Diary

Here’s a few pics taken with my phone of this week. The beach is now chaotically busy which to me is a shame if I am honest. The sea may no longer be blue and they are throwing a lot of rubbish on the sand which ends up in the ocean poisoning the wildlife and contaminating the water. Very sad about it. Keep Britain Tidy. Pick up your crap and dispose of it correctly. Percy is about. He is my gull. I hand reared him. Well actually one of my neighbours informed me Percy is female so hey ho. Have been working on a design venture for the future. It’s taken all my free time. I don’t know how I ever fitted it all in. What with the ongoing sporadic things going on and five pets. I turned myself blue by accident too and became quite unwell with it but I don’t want to talk about that. All I will say is always do some research before drinking anything.

Then my parents have been painting up their furniture and potted over 200 plants in 2 days. They’re both near 90 years of age (mid to late 80’s … I don’t know exactly). My eldest son is juicing and doing his garden so beautifully. And I have had a few lovely pics from friends – in particular Janet Alleyne who is an earth goddess. My neighbour Josie sent the one of the crab – the gulls left it on her doorstep. It was alive and healthy so she put him back on the beach. Nice thought tho from the gulls.

Focus on the positive. Focus on the love and find the good in others. It all comes back to you. Tiff. X

 

Fylde Pebbles and Flower Moon by Tiffany Belle Harper

I am worried that I will become addicted to the internet. It happened many years ago when I did not have my own home – I was in hell. I had nothing I could do and felt so rubbish due to ill health both physically and mentally. It went on for years. I swore I would never go back there again. I will never forget those hard times hindered by so many cruel intentions around me. So anyway, I am allowing myself an hour a day online. Been doing this for a couple of weeks now. I have gone through all my notes and old photographs etc. It’s been soul searching – sad and happy. I have let go of a lot of pain.

Until lock down, I always have done things in the real world to try to help causes etc. Most people I know do the same. It’s a good way to get to sleep each night knowing you’ve done something purposeful. I am going to bed real early and getting up earlier too. I am getting a routine for myself, for the first time in years of some normality. Making time without feeling guilty. I have put on weight though, due to eating more chocolate and enjoying real butter. The pets are loving having me around them 24/7. I am making more time to hear my friends. I must admit WhatsApp I love. I am waking up to little posters and lovely messages. But I have never in my life carried my phone around with me. I put it down in another room unless I am expecting a call and it’s on silent. I am never going to put my brain in a machine like that. It’s not normal or right. People’s value should be measured in value not a screen.

Each morning, I tend to check emails, then I go on instagram to see what friends are doing by way of quotes and pictures and I get myself feeling positive with like minded. I try to do Facebook but it’s a swift entrance and exit as there is so much chaos there if you start to look around. Twitter is like a huge ball of utter madness. People regard a like or share as an endorsement and I know for a fact they don’t sign petitions or go out and vote they think a share is enough. It’s lazy. I love to blog. It makes me feel so peaceful. I learn and often the news is ahead and much more accurate. Each time I go online I want to be here less. I think eventually I will just not bother at all. I don’t want it around me, but then on the flip side of that I would miss my blog as it’s like my little space to remember. And to read so many great posts too. With blogging it is not a race or competition and nobody pays to be heard because it’s not about that. Blogging is a very personal thing. It’s brilliant. And I love sharing my photography over at TiffanyBelleHarperArt

I have set strict goals what I will and will not look at on the internet as otherwise we can very quickly become miserable or concerned by things that are probably not real. I am just using my time to get things done and enjoy the stuff I forget I had. But the main thing is music. I am listening to Jazz and Classical for much of the time and I am losing myself in it. I have also started to write the book I thought I’d finished which will probably get published years ahead of now as I am enjoying my other hobbies so much. Candle making and cooking are taking the lead but I know I need to work on the new website and project. I don’t know how I ever fitted anything else in at all. Oh well … hey ho.

Anyway, lovin’ these big pebbles two girlfriends of mine got from the sand dunes on the Fylde Coast and painted. I am going to sell these. Think they’re FAB. And it’s a powerful full moon tonight. A Scorpio Flower Moon. Letting go of all the rubbish. Clearing space for new beginnings. Nature is happier and the air is better. Nothing to miss really.

Tiff. X